Home again

So, it's back home for the big farewell/30th thing. Not quite sure what I
wanted out of the weekend, but so far it is living up to the whole cliche
about not being what you want, but what you need.

I had in mind a night out with my dad, perhaps a few home truths about me
leaving and him, then a dodgy bar. Instead I just got the full gamut of why
I hate this place. A chinese full of obnoxious people, with my hypocritical
dad complaining about loud jews. A bar full of platinum blonde mutton
dressed as lamb and 17 year olds, full of cronies in suits. Then a bar with
the missing generation of late 20s early 30s, all married, all tarted up
and all identikit. Not improved by step-mother and equally sour faced
friend in attendance. Footballers' wives has nothing on this.

Good god get me away from this place.

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Introspection

Well here I am on another work "touchy feely" course to make me a better
person. Actually, I love all this kind of stuff, and am moving more into
doing this sort of work with clients. So what have I learned so far?

We did an interesting exercise where you had to sit down and plot your life
on a time line, showing your highs and lows (above the line when you were
energised and liberated, below the line when you we demotivated and
de-energised. There was then a paired share, so you took turns with a
partner to drill down into emerging patterns and look for what themes and
values you needed to be happy - either what was always there in the good
times, and what was missing in the bad.

This was actually a very useful exercise, and drove me to some insights.
I'd encourage people to try this - ideally with someone else to force them
to question their values. Really ask "why, why, why" - don't let people get
away with glib rationalisations.

The conclusion for me - I need:
- intellectual freedom
- supportive environment
- humour
- direction - a sense I am headed somewhere

What was surprising was that although in my head I have always thought I
needed to be a relationship, these did not even appear on the chart. A very
valuable insight that will help my self esteem and game a great deal.

Update on the rest of my life to follow!

Day 2 with Mrs Robinson

Had my Sunday lunch meeting with the older lawyer - very cute, very funny,
less high maintenance than she thinks she is.

She texted to say she'd be late, so I grabbed a coffee rather than look
like a loser waiting around, and turned up after she did - first time I
have consciously done that - set a different (and helpful) dynamic to have
her waiting for me.

Spent most of the day in heavy comfort building mode - lots of stories
about my little brother to show protector of loved ones etc. Bounced to a
DVD store because she had mentioned the need to stock up (and she had
confessed to a closet love of sci-fi - think I'm in love...) And then onto
an outdoor table at a pub in Covent Garden for a few drinks and very public
make outs. I had been steadily escalating kino from the moment we met, and
again, doing this consciously and watching for reactions really helped
calibrate things.

On for dinner this week, and we'll see if the 7 hour rule holds!

One thing that I should mention, I was able to be a lot more conscious of
this stuff because I was sober, and reading back it all looks quite
clinical. Quite the opposite, I had a fun time and it all felt natural, I
was just more aware of what I was doing. This is encouraging for two
reasons:
(1) I am internalising some of the game stuff, but more importantly,
(2) I am more comfortable occupying that meta-self reflective space that is
the key to "personal mastery" as L. Michael Hall would have it. This goes
way beyond game, but covers the whole of your life, and for me gaming is
just a facet of that journey I am hoping to go on.

Peace out, I should sleep, but as a note to myself, don't let me forget to
cover my new opener, synchronicity, and Sinn's travails...

Reflections on a topsy-turvy weekend

A weekend of ups and downs... Last minute drinks with boys was a laugh on
Friday night, ended up having a curry in Brick Lane - aussie mate was
complaining that he hadn't had a hot curry since getting to the UK, so I
stitched him up with a Faal... He hasn't been able to sit down since! Paid
homage to my Jewish roots with a dozen bagels and a tub of cream cheese
from the all night bakery. Have eaten little else all weekend!

Already posted about the Friend flaking on me. In the end a girl I met
working in Australia called up and wanted me to take her drinking in town,
and asked to go to real English pubs. Hit paydirt with the second one - a
table of drunk council estate girls (mostly cute but trashy for our US
readers) got into a fight with two guys. They were hurling insults at each
other, and not in a cocky funny way. The least attractive girl came up with
"Ikd rather lick a fat woman's pussy than kiss you", which gives you some
idea of the level. We left just as the bouncers chucked the guys out for
smashing a bottle...

Day 2 report to follow...

Hubris

Ah well, if nothing else, it demonstrates the power of the law of attraction (watch the Secret...). Had a funny feeling all day that the Friend was going to bale on me, and sure enough I just got a lame e-mail about losing phone, not having my number and having all sorts of bullshit emergencies to deal with.

On the plus side, I had started to get carried away in my head with the problems that it might cause if we started a relationship just before I went to Sydney, so that problem is solved. Anyone else do this thing where your thoughts get miles ahead of where they should be? A good lesson...

So, do I now make a booty call, go to a friend of a friend's leaving drinks or write the evening off, get some sleep and look forward to Mrs Robinson tomorrow? Torn between the last two... Tempted to sack it and catch up on sleep.

What is interesting though is that I am handling this 1000x better than I would have 1 year ago - a measure of how far I have come on my personal development journey, of which more later...

Happy hunting tonight guys and gals...

TFI Friday...

Well, the weekend is here, and I can't wait. My current project just finished, so the next week or so will be quite quiet, and I'm seeing the Friend tomorrow night. She wants to 'hang out' at her place, which I have only just understood as her specific shorthand for all sorts of fun, so looking forward to it. It's nice, I haven't actually been on too many dates recently where I have had that 'tingle'. Not sure if this is somethings that is common in the PUA community - does it really take away the excitement, or have I just been setting standards too low?

Other than that, planning to go to Borough market and pick up some nice food for the weekend. Cooking for friends on Sunday, so might as well go all out!

Having a lot of fun reading Sinn's blog at the moment - he has been teaching in Sydney, so I am furiously trying to internalise all the tips and tricks he and Captain Jack have been learning before I go out there. Hopefully I'll be able to go on his Day Game seminar in London before I leave - will be good to learn from the master himself! Check out his blog in the link on the right.

And finally, picked up a new phone on Ebay today - Nokia N73, with a 3.2 mega pixel camera. I'm very into photography, and really excited by having a phone that can finally take decent pictures rather than my crappy work one. Will post a review on here when it arrives!

Happy hunting y'all...

Girls, girls, girls

So, in that frustrating way that only blokes will understand, as soon as I decide to move to Sydney, I am inundated. This has never happened before! A brief rundown on the girls in my life right now:

-The Ex: lovely girl, still great friends but we just don't work together - we just push each others buttons - see each other often and have an unfortunate habit of sleeping together when we are determined not to

- Easy: a girl I met at TMM bootcamp about 6 months ago - 24, not stunning, but a lot of fun and always calls when she has had too much to drink, wanting to come over - who am I to disappoint, especially when she is filthy

- Mrs Robinson: a new addition - very cute older lawyer I met in a bar last week - Day 2 on Sunday - watch this space!

- Not with yours: met on a dating evening run by a friend - very nice, but not my type. Or yours. Or anyone's really. I'm just being a pussy - went for dinner because she is genuinely interesting, but she is looking for love, and I haven't got round to telling her to stop texting me.

- The Friend: an ex-colleague who I have had a thing for since we met 3 years ago. We were always quite close, she changed jobs and we stayed in touch. Over the last two weeks it all of a sudden got physical. She is cute, frighteningly smart, but I just cannot read this girl. She seems to shut herself away and deliberately give no signals. Only just starting to decode what for her are blatant signals, to me go way over my head. She baled on me tonight - I actually really like this one - if it wasn't for Sydney... But maybe that's why it has got physical, the pressure is off. Hmm.

- FOF: Friend of a friend who lives in NY - I'm over there regularly, and she is always happy to oblige...

So I can't complain, but lets be honest, if I were less of a rAFC, I would ditch all but the Friend, enjoy that for what it is, and practice my game rather than taking the easy option. Besides, I'm knackered!

Kick off...

So, here I am, adding my musings to the overcrowded world of blogs... why, you ask, why? I wanted a way to track my life, share my musings, get feedback on my ideas and if I happen to entertain anyone along the way, so be it!

So who am I and why should you read this? I'm English, about to move to Australia (can't wait) and am very smart. If that's a problem for you, tough, I have to deal with it, so can you... This is mainly going to be about my main interests in life - girls, gadgets, football, and crap jokes.

I recently read The Game, took a bootcamp and am an aspiring PUA - if you know what any of that means, you will likely have fun as you watch me record my faltering steps away from being a rAFC... Determined not to be a keyboard jockey - my work makes me travel a lot, so I am getting better and better at going out on my own and chatting to people, the PUA stuff has really helped with that and its a lot of fun, but more on that later. If you're interested in this stuff check out the links part - you have to read guys like Sinn, Savoy and Future.

This won't all be about pickup - read on for more about mynew life in Sydney, my weird and wonderful work life and really anything that is bugging me!